Pamela is growing up too fast.  I am so grateful for her.  She is beautiful.  I am feeling overwhelmed with trying to share all the love I want to with my boys.  I feel like most of my focus is the newborn pam.  I don't feel like I am giving Joan enough attention .  This is difficult for me because I love to give love.  I love my boy so much!  I feel like I am yelling at them more than I am giving love.  I need to figure it out so I can give more love.  Today we went to the splash pad with KELLI and her kids.  It was fun!!